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#1
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One morning Dick Cheney and George W. Bush were having brunch at a DC restaurant. While the two were looking over the menu, the attractive waitress asks Cheney what he would like and he replies, "I'll have a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit."
"And what can I get for you, sir?" she asks George W. He replies, "How about a quickie?" "Why, Mr. President," the waitress says, "How rude. You're starting to act like Mr. Clinton!" The waitress storms away. Cheney leans over to Bush and whispers, "It's pronounced "quiche."
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#2
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lmao good one
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